The 3 Most Important Questions You Must Answer To Never Fail

How This Subtle Piece of Wisdom Can Change Your World

One of my darling’s of Literature is Leo Tolstoy and his story of  “The Three Questions” impacted me profoundly as a mother and as a business owner.

If you aren’t familiar with the story, it’s based on a king’s idea that he would never fail if he knew the answer to these three questions:

What is the right time for every action?
Who are the most necessary people?
What is the most important thing to do?

Just as many intelligent and capable business owners seek answers to questions like these every day, you will always get different answers.

Are you paying attention?

There will always be more information out there, there will always be more “answers”.

Until you fully understand the questions through application, you will be left seeking instead of succeeding.

As a business owner, you are naturally innovative. I am asking you to shift your thinking now, so you can finally understand the answers you seek – have always been there.

In fact, I’m quite certain you’ve held the answers all along, but they’ve been fragmented and you’ve been distracted from them.

We’ve been taught to always be reading – but why? Is more information going to be the answer?

We’ve been told we have to work harder – but why? Is more hustle going to be the answer?

I don’t believe you need more information – there’s no magic book, coach or program that if you just had it or did that or hired them – you’d have the answer.

So where do you break this cycle?

When you continue to seek you will always find someone who is willing to give you their answer.

Until you experience the answers for yourself you may never understand the meaning of your own purposeful gifts. As in Tolstoy’s story, so many men attempted to answer the king’s questions, but they all came up with different answers.

When the king decided to ask a wise hermit in a nearby village he had to disguise himself as a peasant, leaving his guards behind.

The hermit was tending his garden when the king arrived. The king asked his questions, but the old hermit went on digging. The king was inclined to offer to dig for him for a while and after digging for some time the king asked his questions again.

Just as the hermit might have answered, a man emerged from the dark woods bleeding profusely from a terrible stomach wound.

The king immediately tended his wound and took care of this man, staying the night in the hermit’s hut. The next day the man was greatly improved but incredulous as to what the king had done for him. The man confessed he had known who the king was and that the king had his brother executed and property seized, he, in fact, had come to kill the king! But the king’s guards had wounded him.

The man pledges his allegiance to the king and goes on his way.

Up until that point, the king had forgotten the questions. Once again the king asks the hermit and this time the hermit responds that he had just had his questions answered.

When we come to know the answers for ourselves it changes everything. As an entrepreneur, as a friend, as a parent, as a human being.

May you come to know the answers for yourself.

The most important time is now. As the present is really the only time over which we have power.

Whomever you are with is the most important person.

To do good to the person you are with is the most important thing to do.

Allow this idea to simmer and see how it evolves in your own life. You have enormous capacity and ability to affect the people in your world profoundly. If you aren’t realizing your own potential in the 3 core areas of your life, reach out for a chat. I just might be that optimizing hermit you’ve been seeking.

How To Start Waking Up To Your Creative Power

I love this quote by Anais Nin. And expanding from this, know that you can also create your states.

In fact, that is what we are each doing at any given moment. We just have been taught that we are not the ones creating our states from the inside out, thus have fallen into the trap of your world created from outside in thus again being the effect.

I assure you, with practice, you can assume any state you truly desire. It is a practice though. So if you have been practicing “being” the effect of external states, or you have been “practicing” with states you don’t wish, then it will be a bit of work to shift.  But it’s doable. The results are miraculous and easier than you can imagine right now.

In fact, there is a momentum in the universe where so many are waking up to their native ability as “creators” that shifts seem to happen faster than we can keep up. All the more reason to take back the controls of your own thoughts, your intentions, your emotions, and your states.

In June, my book Peace Doesn’t Come In a Pill will be released. In it, I describe the exact process I used to literally bring wake the dead…I’ll share more details soon.

Meanwhile, create a state of your wish fulfilled.

Is Your Creative Process in Need of Some Shears?

Pruning the Vine So You Can Feed the Best Version of You

Have you ever found yourself so busy doing lots of actions that just don’t seem to be giving the results you once hoped for? Whether in terms of inner fulfillment, a sense of accomplishment, joy and contribution, or monetary fulfillment? 

There is a beautiful quote by the prolific Ralph Waldo Emerson that brings to mind the necessary action when we are not finding our way to express our highest potential.

Here’s that epic quote from Emerson.

As the gardener, by severe pruning, forces the sap of the tree into one or two vigorous limbs, so should you stop off your miscellaneous activity and concentrate your force on one or a few points.

 Why is it necessary for you to do that?

Because as you remove the dead and even many of the living vines that seem to have inadvertently come in to choke out your creative energy, you have more power to focus on what is truly important to you! 

The springtime of our lives arrives and with it the potential for significant blossoming.  If you’ve pruned the vines then the new saplings can get the food they need to thrive. If not, they may get choked out and buried as they suck the food.

What better analogy than that of gardening to describe the creative process?  If you look at what you are giving your attention to, is it what you want to blossom?

 After all, isn’t your creative process really just like being the garden of your life?

What are you doing in your life? What are the daily actions that you do, even down to the mundane?  Are they pulling your energy, sucking the life force away from the important things you wish to have blossomed in your life?

Are you doing any random actions (I know I have)  that are a distraction to your true desires?

What are you doing that is not allowing you to concentrate your energy and love toward what you would deeply desire to create?

For me, I’ve desired 3 things, but I’ve spent my life to this point scattered with the many random seeds that blew my way, without a thought of how or what might fruit in my garden. And they have nearly choked out the most precious of my garden.

I assure you though, it’s never too late to get your creative energy back, after all, you are part of nature and so resilient. 

The act of pruning might feel daunting if you’ve let it get well overgrown, but I assure you it will be worth it. Severe pruning may seem essential, but it will allow for the creative energy that is you to flow to where it will truly be appreciated.

Once you’ve got it nicely pruned and it’s been nourished, take the time to appreciate, celebrate and enjoy what you have cultivated! But then get those shears out maintain that beautiful garden, knowing that it is, after all, a process

Ready for more creative power?

What do you think,  are you in need of some severe pruning?

If this resonates, share in the comments below and if you need more insight into the creative process of showing up as the best version of yourself, let’s chat.

 

No Two Clients Are Alike

If You Don’t Understand Your Client, You Won’t Be Able To Stand Your Client

As a mom and a business owner I learn a lot from parenting that helps me in my business. I have two very different little boys and I have had to adjust my thinking about how to raise children. No two children are alike. My oldest, Ryder, who is eight, is gentle, nurturing and has an innate ability to see the bigger picture. Dax, my 5-year-old, is an artist through and through. Emotional, sensitive yet very intense. I’ve had to really step back and see my boys from a place of full presence and not fit them into a structure I found in books, approaches or guidelines. In other words, I still have to be and do my parenting.

As any parent knows, understanding is one of the most important pieces to parenting. If you don’t understand your children, you won’t be able to “stand” your child.

In business, no two clients are alike. Any cookie cutter approach or system out there can tell you to do “these steps and it’s a no fail”. I say, that’s a fast way to poor results. If you do not understand your client you won’t be able to stand them. Conversely, they won’t be able to stand you and you are going to have a lot of unhappy clients or none at all.

You must understand your client and their unique needs, what drives them, what specific fears, beliefs or lack of skills might be stopping them. If you communicate in a way that’s like a robot or a script not your own – no matter how much you’ve rehearsed or practiced, you aren’t fully present – not with yourself, not for your client. I can guarantee full understanding will be missing.

Last week I was working with a client who had a challenge around clearly communicating during enrollment conversations. I knew she was following the script of a competent and successful business coach but she hadn’t “made it her own”. As an actress I am very much an advocate of living truthfully even in imaginary circumstances and I teach this to my clients. We don’t need anymore talking heads. We need hearts opening and communicating their truth.

What I felt was intriguing and what she experienced was a breakthrough that led to her landing her first major client with a huge success story from the client just from the enrollment conversation alone.

Here’s what I coached her on: I knew the best way I could help her was to “ACT” as a real client so I could actually “FEEL” how it went rather than think and analyze the process. When she was following the script I felt a break/cut in our connection and as a result the understanding diminished. I felt less interested in what she had to offer and actually confused by the words she was saying and in her ability to help me and my desire to hire her, when moments before had genuinely been there.

I felt myself really wanting her services when she was fully connected with me, listening to me, coaching me, directing me from her grounded and authentic place as her unique genius, her blessed gift and talent as a coach. It happened each time she went back to the “script”. I could feel the disconnection. I could feel the break in understanding. Even though she was word for word of a “masterly” written script. I could feel myself getting distracted. As I expressed this to my client we were able to tweak and work through this in order to refine her enrollment conversations. By the end of the session, she was laughing and excited about doing what she does best, connecting!

Every time I work with a client I gain so much more understanding. It is so important to fully understand our own truth, know our own unique voice and from a confident present place, listen, observe and respond. Only then will you truly understand the person in front of you, whether it is your child, your client or yourself! That’s what I like to call stepping on to Your Center Stage.